STARK FAILS
by Joki of Sassgard
Summary: In order to get revenge on Tony, Clint Barton and Thor Odinson set out on a hilarious mission to obtain potential viral internet videos of Tony failing. And failing epically. *SPIN-OFF of my other fic, The Everyday Misadventures of Earth's Mightiest Heroes* (don't own the cover image) Completed! :D
1. Smoothies and Secret Cameras

***throws confetti* Welcome all! **

**Please note that this is a spin-off of my series of one-shots entitled "The Everyday Misadventures of Earth's Mightiest Heroes." If you want to find out how this spin-off came to be, then please check out Chapter 25 of that series entitled "Thor Discovers Social Media"**

**And once again, thanks to those who requested Stark Fails! I was absolutely floored by how many of you wanted more! :D**

**So without further ado….. Enjoy!**

* * *

Thor paced back and forth like a caged animal. What was taking the archer so long? Oh how he hoped Clint would hurry. What would he tell Tony if the billionaire caught him pacing like this? Thor knew he was a terrible lair. What if-

There was a knock on the window.

Thor rushed over and threw it open and Clint dropped into the room from the roof. "Got it," he whispered holding up the teeny camera between his thumb and fore-finger. "Does Tony suspect anything?"

"Nay," Thor answered as he shut the window. "Tony has been isolated in his lab all morning."

Clint wiggled his eyebrows. 'In that case, I'm gonna need a distraction."

Thor grinned and flipped Mjolnir. "Then a distraction you shall have."

* * *

Tony pulled off his protective goggles and blew on the red-hot piece of metal. Placing the torch down on his work table he grabbed a pair of pliers. This would require the utmost of skill and concentration. Just one mistake, and-

_"AAAAHHHHRRRGGG!"_

Yelping, Tony jumped involuntarily and knocked the metal off the table. "Crap." Tony muttered. He contemplated for a minute on whether he should go help Thor. That was definitely his roar. Maybe the god was in trouble.

Deciding the torch was his best choice of weapon at the moment, Tony ran towards the sound. The kitchen.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa,!" Tony interrupted Thor mid-yell. Thor paused, Mjolnir raised into the air aimed at… the toaster?

"What the heck, Thor?!" Tony demanded. "What's your deal?"

"This metal contraption refuses to relinquish my breakfast!" Thor exclaimed. Then let Mjolnir fall on the poor toaster.

Tony groaned. "Thooooor…." His eyes came to rest on a blender next to the now smashed toaster. Inside was an apple, banana, and orange unpeeled and whole, swimming in milk. "I'm scared to ask, but what is that?" Tony pointed to the mess.

Thor chuckled. "Not to worry, friend Stark. I was about to make what you mortals call a 'smoothie' to accompany my toast. But I know how this contraption works." The thunderer reached to switch on the blender-

"Thor, wait-!"

Tony was about to tell Thor that he forgot to put on the lid but he wasn't fast enough. Milk and chunks of dismembered fruit went flying. The billionaire fought his way through the smoothie storm to the off switch. Hair dripping with milk, Tony just glared at the god who looked back with the most innocent expression as he whipped banana off his trusty hammer.

_*POP*_

Two pieces of smashed bread popped out of the destroyed toaster.

Thor rubbed his chin. "I seem to be experiencing technical difficulties."

There was a tense moment of silence before Clint walked in. "Hey Tony, do you…" He paused mid-sentence and mid-stride. "What happened here?"

Still staring at the Asgardian, Tony answered: "Thor. That's what happened."

Clint picked off an orange peel that he'd stepped in. "I see…. Why don't you go get a shower? I'll help clean up here."

Tony just stared at Thor for a few more seconds before stomping off to his bathroom. He was too perturbed to even think about why Hawkeye was being so… nice.

When he was out of ear shot, Thor looked at Clint hopefully. The archer grinned and rubbed his hands together menacingly. "The deed has been done." Clint swiped a towel off the counter and threw it at Thor. "Now clean up this mess."

* * *

**This was a little more history and such but not to worry, you'll get to see Tony failing soon XD**

**I'll do my best to update every Tuesday. If you have a trigger you'd like to see, leave it in the reviews and I'll see what I can do with it (no promises, but I'll do my best) but please keep in mind that this is a K+ rated series.  
**

**Please follow, favorite, and all that jazz ;3;  
**

**And if you haven't already, I'd appreciate it if you'd check out the Misadventure series (updates every Friday).**

**Thanks for reading! **


	2. Bored

*_Clomp, clomp, clomp_*

Tony thudded around in his lab in nothing but an undershirt, boxers, and his Iron Man jet boots. He was the only living soul in the tower today, thus the explanation for his current wardrobe. The billionaire knew he should be working because there were a ton of repairs and modifications to make on his new suit. Or at least taking a nap since he'd lost count of how many hours he'd been up, but he was just so….. _Bored_.

Had he known that cameras had been so cleverly concealed in his lab, Tony would have at least pretended to be hard at work but instead he rummaged around in one of the many junk draws unaware that Clint was spying on him.

"Where is it, where is it, where is… " Tony muttered to himself. "Ah ha!" He held up a can of spray paint and shook it vigorously.

Sleep-deprived and dangerously hyper, Tony clomped, clomped, clomped, his way over to the far wall of his lab, still shaking the can. Inspiration struck him and he aimed the nozzle and sprayed. A trail of bright yellow pain splattered against the wall and Tony held his breath. He hated the smell of paint fumes.

Once satisfied with his work, Tony grabbed one of his Iron Man gloves sitting on a table. He tugged it on and turned around to his artwork, a smiley face. Wet paint trailed its way down the wall as Tony took aim. But Jarvis interrupted before he could fire.

_"Sir, forgive my intrusion, but your actions seem more illogical than usual."_

Tony snorted. "That's because…" The light of his repulsor began to glow. "I'm bored."

Iron Man blasted the smiley face.

"Bored, bored, bored, bored."

With each declaration of "bored," the smiley face got blasted again and again until it was made from craters in the wall instead of paint.

Tony plopped down on the floor. "I'd make a brilliant Sherlock," he said around a yawn. "And you, my dear Jarvis," he spoke to the ceiling. "Would make a brilliant Watson."

_"I'm flattered, sir."_

But the billionaire didn't hear his AI answerer. He had fallen asleep.

* * *

_Meanwhile, on the Helicarrier:_

Clint finished proof-watching the footage on his tablet and smiled at his cleverness. Tony had never suspected a thing. Why hadn't he thought of this sooner?

* * *

**A bored Tony is a weird, slightly disturbing, out-of-character Tony apparently :P  
**

**Anyways, thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Reviews are always appreciated :) **


	3. Star Spangled Banner

"Bruuuuce…."

Tony waited for a reply.

"Psst, hey Brucie…"

The light snore of Bruce Banner was the only response.

"Huh," Tony said to himself. To good doctor was actually fast asleep at his desk, his glasses half-on, half-off his face. Tony wheeled his swivel chair next to him. They had been tinkering away the hours in the lab and it must've finally taken a toll on him.

"This isn't some kind of joke, is it?" Tony kept talking. "Helloooo," he poked him.

Bruce kept snoring.

Tony sighed. Working by alone was always so boring compared to working with his science bro. Crestfallen, the philanthropist when back to going through a stack of old files piled high in his desk. "_This is going to take forever_," Tony silently lamented, grabbing a file. Something slipped from the pages and fluttered to the floor. Tony leaned down and picked it up. Much to his surprise, it was a sheet of gold star stickers.

"Wha-? I don't remember-"

A snore caught in Bruce's throat.

An idea suddenly leapt into the genius' head and a devious smile crept onto his face. Whoever said your BFF had to be awake for you to have fun?

Tony Stark pushed off the desk with over-exaggerated flair and swiveled across the room, catching himself on Bruce's desk. Ripping open the packet of stickers, Tony carefully peeled on off and stuck it on Bruce's forehead, then another to his nose.

He worked quickly and efficiently, careful not to wake up Bruce. In a few minutes, the sleeping doctor was covered in gold stars.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the Star Spangled _Banner._" Tony cracked up at his own joke. "Hmm, I like the sound of that….." Tony stroked his chin thoughtfully, then out of the blue, began to sing:

**"Oh, say can you see? How Bruce is turning green,**

**Into a gamma man that smashes the town.**

**And no matter what they say he's not that mean,**

**And his pants are apparently the strongest thing around.**

**He the only buff nerd that I've ever heard**

**Of ,which is actually pretty absurd. **

**Oh say does that star-spangled Banner yet snore,**

**On the desk next to me, cuz I guess I am a bore!"**

Tony ended his abrupt solo with a patriotic salute and bowed to an imaginary crowd. He turned to Bruce once again and began taking the stickers off so he wouldn't have to explain his actions whenever his science bro woke up. But not before he snapped a picture with his phone.

Bruce stirred the moment Tony threw away the last sticker. He rushed back to the files and pretended he'd been working this whole time. Bruce sat up and yawned.

"Sorry about the unexpected cat-nap. Was I out long?" He asked stretching.

Shaking his head, Tony replied. "Nah, just a few minutes or so."

"Okay good," Bruce cleaned his glasses on his shirt before he went back to work. Tony hid his face behind the folder he was 'reading.' He thought he had actually gotten away with his antics.

But the hidden camera said otherwise.

* * *

**Do you have any idea how looooong it took to rewrite the US National Anthem? -_- I sat at my computer for over an hour trying to come up with something... I hope my persistence pays off XD**


	4. Steve is Suspicious

Clint was hiding away in his usual spot in the rafters waiting for the latest video to upload. He'd taken the liberty to add music in the background of Tony's abrupt performance. This was golden. Now all he had to do was find Thor.

However, unbeknownst to Clint, Steve Rogers could hear the National Anthem from the far end of the Helicarrier. He had a sixth sense when it came to sniffing out anything patriotic. Plus his aftershave smelled like life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

So when Hawkeye finally dropped down from the rafters, he nearly landed on top of Steve. "Whoops, sorry 'bout that Cap," Clint apologized.

"Did I hear music?" Steve questioned, eyebrow raised.

Hawkeye shrugged without turning around. Steve probably wouldn't approve of Stark Fails so he was going to keep it a secret for as long as possible. "Just listening to my tunes," he fished his iPod out of his pocket and waved over his head for proof.

Steve watched the archer retreat. Clint had been acting stranger than usual. Now that he'd thought about it, he had seen him hanging out with Thor more and more over the last few weeks. Something was definitely up.

And he was going to find out what it was.

* * *

**Yes, yes, I know, not funny, but unlike Misadventures, I'm planning for this series to actually have some sort of plot. (plus I really didn't have any ideas this week :P)**

**If you have an idea for something you'd like to see Tony fail at or perhaps a practical joke you'd like Clint and/or Thor to pull on him, please leave them in the reviews. Again, no promises that I'll use them but you never know! They may help spark my creativity. (but please keep them family friendly)**


	5. Mjolnir Madness

**A/N: Shout-out to Guest for this idea!**

* * *

Thor and Clint had become internet sensations. Thanks to the ever so dependent Jarvis, they knew Tony wouldn't find out about their scheming for a while at least and they were determined to take every advantage of this opportunity. And so they decided to 'branch out' with even more hidden cameras.

Thor knew exactly what to do next.

* * *

For three long, grueling weeks Tony suffered at the hands of Pepper. That woman was merciless, Tony accused. Why else would she make him go on a diet?

Pepper Potts had somehow managed to remove every sugar-filled, diabetes inducing, fattening food from Stark Tower and Tony was desperate for something sweet. The genius was currently searching through every draw, cabinet, and cupboard for something that didn't involve Tofu, wheat-grass, or soy bean sprouts.

He groaned in anguish as he stood on his tip-toes to search the very back of a cabinet. "No! She found my secret Twinkie stash," he lamented. Tony hung his head, defeated. Then Thor walked into the room.

"What ails you Stark?" Thor inquired.

Tony sighed dramatically. "I have nothing to-" he looked up at the god of thunder and gasped. Thor was holding the largest jar of Nutella he'd ever seen. Tony stared like a deer caught in headlights.

Thor licked the chocolaty goodness of a spoon.

A desperate request for the tiniest amount of Nutella was on the tip of Tony's tongue but Thor interrupted when he bellowed. "I must have crackers to accompany my glorious spread!"

Thor bolted out of the room but not before he set the placed the jar on the counter and, much to Tony's dismay, Mjolnir on top of the jar.

"Noooooo!" Tony dove but he was too late, Thor was long gone. Frantic, Tony pulled at Mjolnir with all his strength and from every possible angle. Sweat dripped from his forehead as Tony ran from across the room and tried to tackle the hammer but to no avail.

He attempted to use the Force, a crowbar, and his Iron Man suits. All at the same time.

Thor returned with a box of Graham Crackers he had purchased as Tony finally gave up. He hid his grin as he watched the billionaire try to cover up his heavy breathing. "Farewell, Tony," Thor said as he grabbed Mjolnir and the Nutella. With his back turned, Thor winked to the camera in the top corner of the kitchen. Fangirls would love that.

Pepper returned mere moments later with a big smile on her face. "I'm proud of you for sticking with this diet, Tony," she praised. "Thor just said he brought in a jar of Nutella and you didn't eat a single bit of it!"

Delighted, Pepper kissed him on the cheek and floated off to change. Tony fell to the floor and wept.

* * *

Tony groggily strolled down the hallway, rubbing his eyes and yawning. It was somewhere around 3 in the morning but when you gotta go, you gotta go. He flipped on the light switch and blinked a few times at the harsh light assaulting his tired eyes. Once he was accustomed to the light, Tony's jaw dropped.

Mjolnir was on the toilet lid.

"THOOOOOOOR!"

* * *

When Thor returned later that morning, Tony was waiting for him outside the bathroom in the middle of an extremely intense game of Tetris.

"…..And how in the world could you forget Mjolnir on the _toilet_ of all places?!" Tony bashed without looking up from his game.

"My apologies," Thor said as he summoned Mjolnir. "It won't happen again."

It took Tony a moment to answer. "Oh, yeah, good. Make sure of that…." He mumbled.

Thor raised his eyebrow at the billionaire. He was completely distracted and Thor got another devious idea. "Here, hold this," he asked.

Tony help his hand out absentmindedly and Thor handed Mjolnir to him. He promptly fell to the floor from the hammer's weight.

Thor bellowed out a laugh and slapped his knee as Tony glared up at the Asgardian from the floor. "Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha." He contributed sarcastically. "Very funny."

"My apologies. How could I resist?" Thor defended. Tony stood up and Thor held out a peace offering. "Will you forgive me?"

Thor was holding a Twinkie. Tony snatched it but then Pepper came around the corner. "What's going on?"

Gasping in horror, Tony bolted away grasping the Twinkie like it was life itself.

"What's gotten into him?" Pepper asked.

Thor just shrugged.


	6. Pepper Crushes Tony's Dreams

***dragges self across a finish line* I MADE IT. Gosh I like cutting it close apparently :P I've been sick so I have some sort of excuse for the last-ish update...  
Anywho, how you enjoy this little diddy which I also like to call "How Age of Ultron Should Have Ended." **

* * *

Tony Stark ran through the tower in search for Pepper. He found her curled up in a chair reading and was pretty miffed with the billionaire interrupted her with his joyous news.

"Pepper, I've just thought of greatest thing in the history of things. And that's saying a lot because I've made a lot of things-"

Pepper held up a finger and Tony fell silent. He nearly burst with excitement as he waited for her to finish the paragraph she was on. At last, Pepper closed her book.

"Now what's all this excitement about?" she inquired.

"Imagine this," Tony began using over exaggerated hand gestures. "Robot sentinels in every corner of the globe with one goal: World peace. I was thinking I could-"

"No." Pepper deadpanned.

Tony blinked at her. "What?"

She repeated her previous statement.

"But-" Tony's protest died on his tongue as Pepper held up hand to stop him.

"There's only about a million ways this could go horribly wrong and you know it."

"But I'm gonna call it Ultron! It's such a cool name and-"

"Toooony," Pepper dragged his name out and narrowed her eyes at him.

Tony hung his head like a 5 year old who was told he couldn't have another slice of cake and sulked back to his lab. With the door closed, he turned around and stuck his tongue out in Pepper's general direction.

"What does she know," he said to himself. "I'll show her….." he scrambled to his desk and started Jarvis on running schematics, simulations, and other complicated stuff when his phone buzzed. It was a text from Pepper that read:_ 'TONY NO._'

Tony shuddered. She had to have some sort of telepathic ability. In the end, he decided he'd rather be Ultron-less than come face to face with the wrath of Pepper Potts.


	7. Painting Steve's Shield

**A/N: Shout-out to FanofJoki for this idea! (BTW, I totally freaked out when I saw your name! *squeals*) **

* * *

Tony carefully surveyed the paint samples laid out in front of him. He was on a mission to find the perfect shade of red and gold to paint his new suits with that wouldn't chip or melt off in extreme temperatures. Grabbing a bucket of specially mixed paint, Tony began to coat several pieces of scrap metal that were laid out on the floor in front of him. It took a while but once he finished, the genius grabbed his special blowtorch and began the experiment. Unfortunately, the paint melted from all the samples.

"Well that's just great," Tony huffed. "Back to square one." Then he saw something from the corner of his eye. There was one piece with the paint still intact.

Internally celebrating, Tony picked it up to survey it closer, but as he held it in his hands he knew something wasn't right. This piece of scrap was a perfect circle and surprisingly light for its size. Then he noticed the straps on the back of it. Tony suddenly felt very queasy.

This was Cap's shield.

"Oh crap." He breathed. "Crap. Crap. Crap. Crap." He rushed to find paint remover but his new invention unfortunately worked too well. The paint wasn't coming off for anything.

Tony fell into his swivel chair clutching the shield so hard his knuckles turned white. He ran a nervous hand through his already disheveled hair. "Think Stark, think," he commanded himself. He stared at his reflection in the now red and gold shield and began practicing excuses.

"Shield? What shield? When did you start using a shield, Steve?"

"Red, White, and Blue is soooo 2014."

"Natasha made me do it."

"I was sleep painting."

It was hopeless. Tony had just decide it would be easier to move to Madagascar and become King of the Lemurs when he heard the last person he wanted to see just outside the door.

Steve Rogers.

Tony scrambled to hide the shield and just managed to shove it under another pile of metal when Captain America walked in. Steve was about to say something but stopped when he noticed how pale Tony was.

"Stark? Are you sick?"

"Uh….. yeah…. In fact I think it's highly contagious and possibly fatal so you might want to get as far away from here as-" he turned around and saw the super-soldier staring at him, concerned. His trusty red, white, and blue shield was strapped on his back. Tony blinked and rubbed his eyes.

"Maybe you should go lay down," Cap suggested. He became more concerned when Tony didn't argue.

"Maybe I should," he mumbled. He didn't take his eyes of Steve's shield and even knocked on it to make sure it wasn't a figment of his panic-stricken imagination and accepted the fact he'd finally gone crazy.

* * *

"How did the switch go?" Thor inquired.

Clint gave a thumbs up and grinned evilly. "I'm on my way to check the cameras now," he said in a hushed voice. "He's probably-"

"He found it."

Thor and Clint jumped at the sound of Captain America behind them, holding up the painted shield. "This is one of Agent Coulson's replicas, isn't it?" He tested the weight as Clint and Thor glanced at each other. "Pretty well balanced."

Clint cleared his throat. "How much do you know?"

Steve stared them down. Thor and Clint could feel the lecture coming. "I know about the hidden cameras. I did some investigating when you two started spending an unusual amount of time together. This is immature and childish. You should have seen Stark in his lab. He was about to have a heart attack. You're using his misfortunes for your own entertainment. I have only one thing to say to you two….."

The partners in crime stared at their feet. They'd been discovered. Steve was about to shut Stark Fails down. Oh well, it had been fun while it lasted.

"I want in."

Clint double checked to make sure his hearing aids were working properly. "Whoa, wait. What?"

Steve handed the shield to Clint. "You heard me. You two aren't the only ones who are looking to get revenge on Tony." He grinned. "I want in."

* * *

**A/N: ****Stark Fails has NOW become a trio... Dun dun duuuuun. Tony's in for it though. He's caused Steve so much grief XP  
**

**I'm afraid I'll have to leave y'all on this minor cliff hanger. I've been super busy this week and things aren't going to settle down for a while so this is going to be the last update for this month. I'm planning on picking up again sometime in July. In the meantime, I'd greatly appreciate it if you'd check out The Everyday Misadventures of Earth's Mightiest Heroes if you haven't already. It's similar to Stark Fails as far as humor goes (I hope anyways). **

**I can't thank you enough for all the kind reviews! I love reading them :)**

**Until next time!**


	8. Prank Backfire

**A/N: Hello again! Welcome new readers and welcome back to my faithful followers. It has been a while!  
In response to reviews: Angel Cauldwell - Uhhh, how about right now? XD**

**Shout-out to Blue Phoenix 217 for this idea!**

**Reviews, follows, and favorites make my day :) Enjoy! **

* * *

Bruce found Tony spinning around in circles in his swivel chair out of boredom. "Hey Tony, where did Natasha go? I can't find her anywhere; I think she's left the tower."

Tony scrunched up his face in thought as he came to a halt. "I guess she's Roamin' off." Tony cracked up at his own joke but stopped when he realized Bruce wasn't laughing with him. "Oh come one. Get it? Roaming off sounds like Romanoff?"

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Bruce shook his head and sighed. "I'll ask Steve."

Watching Bruce leave, Tony returned to spinning, wondering why his humor was so under-appreciated.

An idea popped into the billionaire's head and he abruptly stopped spinning. Natasha's gone? This called for something….. devious.

* * *

Everything was in place. The next time the female assassin washed her hair, it would be dyed a bright shade of lime green that would glow in the dark. It had taken Tony longer than he thought it would to come up with the perfect shade of green. But it would be worth it.

The dye had been planted in the shampoo bottle. Now all Tony had to do was wait.

* * *

Pepper turned on her shower and adjusted the water to just the right temperature. There was no better way to relax after a long day of conferences than a nice hot shower. She reached for her shampoo bottle and groaned when she discovered it was much too light.

"Seriously? It seems like I just bought this yesterday." She thought to herself. "Oh well, I'll just have to borrow someone else's."

* * *

Whistling a tune, Tony returned to spinning in his chair, pausing to cackle now and then at the thought of Natasha's hair glowing in the dark. Then he heard the sound of heels clicking in the hallway. He had just enough time to pretend like he'd been busy when Natasha walked in.

"Hey, have you seen Bruce?" she asked. "I heard he was looking for me."

Tony turned around, disappointed to find that her hair was still red. "Not recently," he answered.

She gave a frustrated sigh. "I'll find him eventually. Oh, by the way, Pepper told me to tell you to pick up some more shampoo. She ran out and had to borrow mine."

Spinning absentmindedly, Tony replied: "Oh okay-" He screeched to a halt. "WHAT?"

Natasha raised an eyebrow. "Pepper is out of shampoo and had to borrow some of mine-"

Tony bolted out of the lab faster than he could have with any Iron Man suit.

"PEEEEPPPEERRR!" he yelled as ran through the tower. "DON'T USE THE-"

The enraged voice of Miss Potts tore through the air.

Tony finished his sentence with a gulp as he skidded to a stop. "…...shampoo."

Pepper burst into the hall, wet, lime green hair tumbling down her shoulders. She gripped Natasha's shampoo bottle in a death grip and her angry eyes shot to Tony.

"How did this happen?!" she demanded.

"I, uh…. it was, I….. ummm," Tony stuttered. "It wasn't meant for you…"

"Wasn't _meant_ for me?" Pepper shrieked. She shoved the bottle at Tony. Pointing to her hair, Pepper spoke slowly through her teeth. "Fix. This. Now."

Tony gulped. "Yes ma'am." He hightailed it back to his lab, nearly running into Natasha who'd pieced everything together by now. She let him go without dishing out any sort of revenge. He would have more than his share from Pepper.

A few minutes later, Tony was still in his lab when he heard Pepper scream: "ANTHONY EDWARD STARK. I GLOW IN THE DARK?!"

Iron Man never worked faster in his life. He didn't even stop to laugh at Pepper's unintended rhyme.

* * *

Later on, Natasha told the unfortunate story to Clint who in turn told it to Thor and Steve.

Captain America whistled. "We didn't even do anything."

Clint shrugged. "Tony seems to have a talent for this kind of stuff."

"But did the cameras get it?" Thor asked the important question.

Nodding, Hawkeye answered "Yup."

They stared at each other for a moment, then burst out into laughter.


	9. Tech Gurus

**A/N: IMPORTANT STUFF: This is the actual new chapter for this week. My apologies again :P**

**This instalment is for all those who requested Steve and Thor pulling a tech prank on Tony. Enjoy! **

* * *

"Alpha, Bravo, Charlie, you reading me Cap?"

Steve adjusted the communication device in his ear. "Loud and clear, Barton."

"Great. Thor's in position."

Grabbing a laptop, Steve sat down at the bar. "You have everything planned out?"

A devious chuckle flowed through the ear piece. "Just trust me Cap. Follow my lead and we'll have Tony so confused he won't know which way's up."

* * *

Tony flipped his wrench up in the air. It turned end over end before he caught it in one smooth motion. He had just fixed the leaky water faucet in Pepper's bathroom in an attempt to get back on her good side. He still had a loooooong way to go, but at least she stopped trying to strangle him.

Now he was on his way to scrub the kitchen until he could see his reflection on every surface. That's were he found Steve Rogers sitting at the bar hunched over a laptop. Tony shook his head. Poor fellow. He just didn't get tech.

"Hey Cap," Tony greeted.

"Tony," Steve returned absentmindedly.

The billionaire stood on the opposite side of the bar and drummed his fingers on the surface. "What are ya doing there?"

"Downloading the digital movie I just purchased."

"Ah, I see..." Tony ducked under the bar to the cabinets to find the cleaner. Pepper usually kept it down here and-

Wait, downloading a movie?

Tony bumped his head on the way back up. "Ow. Did you just say you're downloading a movie?"

Steve glanced up at him and raised an eyebrow. "Uh, yeah? The last Hobbit movie. The other two had a little too much CGI for my taste but the story was-"

Tony blinked. "CGI?"

"Yes, Tony, Computer Generated Imagery. Don't you know about this?"

The billionaire just realized his mouth was hanging open and shut it. "Of course I do. I just didn't know you did...?"

Steve rolled his eyes. "It's not that complicated."

"But-"

"Ah, there you are, Captain!" Thor interrupted. He held up the tablet he was holding. "Could you email me the link to the site where you got the movie?" The god spoke slowly enunciating each word in an almost robot-like fashion but Tony didn't seem to notice.

"Did the Asgardian just say 'email,' 'link,' and 'site,' all in the same sentence?"

"Try to keep up, will you Tony?" Steve suggested. To Thor he added. "Sure thing," then began plucking away at his keyboard.

"Many thanks to you. I also came to ask if you would be interested in watching 'The Lego Movie' with me."

Steve shrugged as he closed the computer. "Sounds good."

Tony watched in disbelief as the Thunderer plugged his tablet into the TV without blowing anything up. He rubbed his eyes. "Something must be wonky with that orange juice I drank for breakfast." he murmured.

"Did you say something?" Steve called over his shoulder.

"Uh... I'll be in the lab if you need anything..." He'd do the kitchen later. Things were getting freaky up here. As he left the room, Thor and Steve shared a fist-bump.

Clint's chuckling came through their earpieces. "Great job, you guys."

In his lab, Tony returned once again to his trusty swivel chair. "I haven't seen the Lego Movie in a while," he talked to himself. "How does that song go again? Oh yeah:"

And then he started to sing.

**Iron man is awesoooomeeee!**  
**Iron man's the coolest one on the team,**  
**Iron man is awwwesooomee!  
He's living out a dream.**

Close enough.


	10. Impressions

**A/N: IMPORTANT: PLEASE READ. I had to do some chapter swapping due to my mistake of uploading the wrong chapter last week XP *facedesk*  
The new chapter this week is now Chapter Nine, entitled 'Tech Gurus.'  
**

* * *

An aggravated groan escaped Tony's mouth as he began plummeting to the ground for the umpteenth time. He crashed onto the hard floor of his garage and lay there for a moment. Testing new Iron Man suits could be such a pain in the neck. Literally.

"_Shall we give it another go, sir?_" Jarvis asked.

Pulling off his helmet, Tony answered: "So I can crash again? No thanks." He sat up and stretched. "You know Jarvis, I've been thinking-"

"_Oh dear._"

Tony wagged a finger in the air. "Don't interrupt. I should have a fall-back for when I retire from being Iron Man."

"_What did you have in mind, sir_?"

"Well I'm a pretty funny guy," Tony stood and removed the rest of his suit and put it away to work on later. "I think I could do stand-up comedy. Or impressions at least. How's this:"

Covering one of his eyes, Tony turned on his heel and glared at nothing in particular. "I'm Nicolas J. Fury," he said in a gruff voice. "I can tell you what you ate for breakfast last Tuesday blah-ba-ty-blah-blah-blah. And if you do anything I don't like, I'll send Black Widow after you."

Now Tony pretended to fluff imaginary hair and checked his nails. "I can break your nose by flipping my hair," he said in a high pitched voice. "And give you cardiac arrest using only my pinky."

"_Hilarious sir_," Jarvis said.

Tony ignored the sarcastic tone in Jarvis' voice. Wait, can robot butlers be sarcastic?

"I ain't finished yet." Tony reprimanded. He snatched a hammer off his work table. "HAVE AT THEE. VILE VILLIANS." He yelled, swinging the weapon. "I AM THE MIGHTY THOR. FEAR MY HAMMER, MY SHINY GOLDEN LOCKS, AND MY BICEPS THE SIZE OF CAMBODIA."

Then he swapped the hammer for a garbage can lid. Standing straight as a rod, he saluted and mocked the distinctly authoritative tone that was Captain America. "Justice. Patriotism. Honor. Integrity. Freedom. And other righteous adjectives. God bless America."

A pair of finger-glasses was Tony's next prop. "Clint," he assumed Bruce's calm voice. "Don't eat that last doughnut. I'll be hungry. You wouldn't like me when I'm hungry."

Dropping the glasses from his face, Tony held an imaginary bow. "Oh yeah?" he gave a cocky smirk to the air. "I can put an arrow in the doughnut hole from two miles away with my eyes closed using only the wind and echolocation. Furthermore, I-"

Tony jumped when he heard a noise behind him. Bruce had just walked in, cleaning his glasses on his shirt. "I came to see if you needed any help with the new suit," he offered.

Relieved he hadn't been caught, Tony accepted. Unfortunately for him, Clint would be sure to show him the footage later.

* * *

Iron Man was now the only Avenger completely unaware of the internet sensation that was Stark Fails.

"My voice is not that high pitched," Natasha crossed her arms defiantly. Clint cracked up. Even Steve couldn't resist the urge to grin.

Thor looked confused. "Are my arms really that gargantuan?" he inquired.

No one answered until the video ended. "I do not use echolocation." Clint muttered.

"He was right about one thing," Bruce spoke up. "You wouldn't like me when I'm hungry. Or sleepy for that matter."

Clint snapped his fingers. "That reminds me." He turned to Dr. Banner. "Do you remember that time when you took a cat-nap in Tony's lab?"

Bruce raised an eyebrow. "Uh, yeah. How'd you know about that?"

Hitting play on the video, Clint replied. "Just watch."

* * *

**And thus, Bruce finally learns about the star stickers.**

**Don't forget to review! :D **


	11. High Score

Nervously, Clint slowly approached Hulk. He seemed bigger than usual. "Okay big guy, remember the plan?"

Hulk grunted and nodded his head. "Hulk remember. Hulk help get revenge for star stickers."

The nervousness slipped away as a smile spread across Clint's face. "Excellent."

* * *

"Where is it, where is it, where is it..." Tony looked under his desk, in all the draws, moving papers, tools and gadgets to the side in search of his lost phone. "I just had to put the thing on silent," he grumbled. He'd lost it at the worst possible time too, just when he was about to beat his high score on Candy Crush. Why did it take so long for the lives to re-load? Tony was to the point in his search where you look in places you've already looked several times.

"Um, Tony? I think we may have a problem." Clint interrupted.

"Not now, Barton. Have you seen my-"

The billionaire was cut off at Hulk roaring and the sound of glass shattering. Clint cringed.

Tony's eyes cut to the archer. "What did you do?!"

Clint rubbed the back of his neck. "I may or may not have beaten Bruce at Monopoly. But it's not my fault that he landed on Boardwalk and I had a hotel."

"HULK NO PAY TAXES. HULK SMASH PUNY BOARD GAME."

Iron Man bolted to the sound of Hulk's rampage before he completely leveled the tower, but when he got there he was met with a strange sight. The Hulk was sitting on what was left of a demolished couch, gingerly playing with something in his ginormous green hand.

"Hey there buddy, what do you say we calm down some, eh?" Tony offered quietly.

Hulk looked up and glared at Clint who ducked behind Tony. "Stupid bird man take all Hulk's money."

"It's just a game-"

The god of thunder ran into the room. "Ah! The gargantuan green giant awakens!" Thor proclaimed and summoned Mjolnir.

"Thor," Tony cautioned "now's not the time to-"

Thor ignored him as usual. "Come, let us continue our battle to see which of us is truly stronger!"

Hulk stood up and busted a lighting fixture. "HULK IS STRONGEST THERE IS!"

With a mighty battle cry, Thor charged and swung his trusty hammer, but Hulk simply made a fist and punched him out a window. Hulk jumped out after him, but not before he hand the thing he was holding to Tony. It was his phone. "Hulk beat high score on candy game."

As Hulk leaped out after the Asgardian, Tony looked at his phone in disbelief. It couldn't be.

It was.

He fell to his knees and yelled in anguish in a Luke Skywalker type fashion. "NOOOOOO!"

* * *

**A/N: And now Bruce gets revenge for the sticker incident.**

**I apologize if my Candy Crush terminology isn't 100% correct. I've never played it... **


	12. Tony Goes Green

**A/N: Shout-out to Avengers4Ever for this idea! (but I changed the color :) )  
**

**Stay tuned for an important announcement. **

**Enjoy!**

* * *

"Hey, Pepper!" Clint jogged to catch up with Ms. Potts. She was just about to leave for a meeting. "Can I ask a favor of you?"

"I'm sorry Clint," she apologized, checking her watch. "But I really need to-"

"Let me re-phrase that." Clint suggested. "How would you like to get some revenge on Tony for the green hair incident?"

Pepper involuntarily reached up to check her hair. That had been a nightmare. "I'm listening."

* * *

Tony paced backstage and flipped through his note cards to make sure they were in order. The noise of the crowd awaiting grew louder as more people arrived with every passing moment. Confident, Tony tucked his notes away in his jacket pocket. He was about to give a speech on Stark Industries' interpretation of clean, self-sustaining energy.

Smiling brightly, Pepper straightened Tony's tie. "Nervous?" she asked.

"Pepper please," Tony scoffed. "When do I get nervous?"

"Just don't forget to _smile_," she reminded.

"Will do."

Tony walked on stage and waved to the crowd of reporters as they applauded. Pepper watched from her spot off stage, hiding her too-wide grin behind her hand. Unbeknownst to Tony, Pepper had switched out the billionaire's toothpaste with the kind Clint gave her. Now his teeth were an unmistakable shade of green.

"Ladies and gentlemen,I want to first of all thank all of you for your support in my quest for a brighter, greener, tomorrow..."

_"... don't forget to smile..._" Tony remembered. So he did.

There was shocked silence in the crowd.

_"Odd._" Tony thought, but he didn't let it waver him.

"Over the past few years, myself and other brilliant scientists have been working on a way to harness arch reactor technology for a more Eco-friendly form of energy. Or you could say-" he smiled wider. "We're going green."

A few audience members chucked, then the laughter grew louder. "_Gosh I didn't think it was that funny._.." Tony thought. _"Huh. This must be better than I thought."_

With new-found spunk, Tony continued his speech with more vigor that before. "It is my vision to see every power plant, hotel, office building, apartment, and home powered by arch reactor tech. I want fossil fuels to become green with envy!"

The crowd erupted in applauds and the laughter grew even more.

"But I can't do it without your help!" Tony thought he was something else. "Start today to go green. Make responsible actions when it comes to energy consumption. Choose the smart way, the earth-friendly way, the Stark way..." The held his arms out and gave his biggest smile yet. "Choose the green way!"

The room exploded into applause and the people who weren't holding their stomachs from laughing so hard jumped to their feet. Tony pumped his fist in the air and began a chant of "Go Green! Go Green! Go Green!" as he made his way off stage.

Tony was pleasantly surprised to see Pepper laughing too. "Not bad, huh?" he grinned.

"It was brilliant," Pepper praised over the chanting. She handed Tony a water bottle. "Thirsty?"

He took a swig, washing away the green from his teeth. "Ahhhh," he exhaled, screwing the lid back on. "Where would I be without my personal secretary?"

* * *

**A/N: Okay I have good news and bad news. What would you like first?**

***pauses for answer***

**Oh. Wait.**

**Good news first then:**

**...**

**...**

**...**

**...**

**There is none. I wanted to say something happy before I dropped the bad news bomb but I got nothin'.**

**Bad news**

**...**

**...**

**...**

**...**

***the suspense builds***

**...**

**...**

**...**

**...**

***insert evil laugh***

**...**

**...**

**...**

**...**

***I am a despicable person***

**...**

**...**

**...**

**...**

** Stark Fails will be ending soon *ducks***

**WAIT. NO. DON'T LEAVE YET. STAY. IT'S OKAY *pats you awkwardly on the head* I imagined you all rioting but I think I'm over-imagining things. **

**Moving on.**

**Inspiration for this fic is getting fewer and father in between. I've already come up with how I want to wrap things up here. I thank each and every one of you that's followed, favorited and reviewed. I'll still keep posting for the next few weeks but I wanted to give you a heads up that the end is nigh but IT AIN'T HERE YET*dramatic music***

**Okay I guess there is some good news. I have no intention of ending the Misadventure series anytime soon :) **

**Wow this has been a long author's note. Hope you all have an awesome rest of the week! *moonwalks away* *trips* *gets up and finishes moonwalking* **


	13. Just Desserts

**A/N: *hides behind a couch* Is it safe to come out? *slowly emerges from hiding spot* Okay everyone, more bad-ish news. There is now I final countdown for Stark Fails. 3 more chapters after this one. I already have them written.*hides behind couch again***

**Also this update is late because FanFiction wouldn't let me log in...**

**Shout-out to Thunderwolf2456 for the inspiration of this chapter :) Enjoy! **

* * *

The dastardly duo that was Clint and Thor casually strolled through New York on their way to Stark Tower. Thor was just about to asked Clint of their next 'plan of attack' when he noticed the archer was being unusually quite. "What are your thoughts, Barton?"

Clint rubbed his chin and answered, "I don't know, Thor, between you and me I'm not sure we can keep Tony in the dark for much longer."

Thor couldn't hide his disappointed expression. "I suppose you are right…"

"Now don't give me that kicked puppy look," Clint looked at Thor over his sunglasses. "I just want our favorite billionaire's discovery to work in our favor. Maybe he won't underestimate so easily after this," Clint grinned. Thor knew that that grin meant trouble now. "And I know exactly what to do."

The god of thunder laughed and jubilantly slapped his fellow Avenger on the back, causing Clint to lose his balance momentarily.

"Watch it dude, I'm fragile." Clint rubbed his shoulder. "Now, here's what I came up with…"

Clint and Thor discussed the best plan of action on the way and had everything nearly planned out when they noticed a caterer truck parked by the tower. Pepper was supervising the employees unloading various sweets and baked goods.

"We're having one final meeting to wrap up the introduction to arch reactor technology being an alternative source of energy," Pepper explained when she saw the Avenger's confused expressions. "And grumpy business owners tend to be more tolerable and open-minded when you feed them."

They nodded in understanding and Clint nudged Thor with his elbow. "What do you say, Goldilocks? Up for one more farewell prank?"

Thor laughed and made a motion to slap Clint again but the archer learned his lesson and jumped out of the way this time. "I thought you'd never ask."

Pepper drew her attention from the food for a moment. "What can I do to help?"

* * *

Following the smell of sugary goodness, Tony found Pepper putting the final touches on one of the conference rooms. He immediately headed over to the table lined with deliciousness but Pepper shooed him away.

"That's for meeting members only," she gave him a pointed look. "And you made it very clear that you had no intention of joining us so you can't eat anything now."

"But I did my part!" Tony pouted. "You said so yourself that my speech was brilliant."

_"Oh Tony you have no idea,"_ Pepper thought then said aloud. "Nice try but the answer is still no." Pepper's phone buzzed. "I'll be back in a minute," she said leaving Tony alone in the room. "Don't touch anything!" she called.

Tony listened to her footsteps grow quieter before he made his way to the table, rubbing his hands together. Pepper really should know better by now. He picked up a doughnut and took a huge bite.

A doughnut that had the cream filling replaced with mayonnaise.

The shock of the nastiness made his eyes water and Tony spat it back out. He quickly headed for the next item in an attempt to get the taste out of his mouth, chocolate truffles.

It was a chocolate covered bruselsprout.

Tony should've known something was up, but he was in such a desperate need to get this disgusting taste out of his mouth that all logic and reasoning was out the window.

He grabbed a cupcake with sprinkles. Too bad the frosting was actually sour cream.

A plate of cookies waited next to the cupcakes and Tony grabbed one unaware that the white center was actually toothpaste.

Never in his life had Tony been so desperate. The very last thing on the table was a simple bowl of M&amp;Ms. He grabbed a handful and poured them into his mouth and chewed. Then discovered it was actually M&amp;Ms, Reese's pieces, and Skittles all mixed together. They formed a giant wad that would take days to chew up but before Tony could spit it out, Pepper returned.

Tony would never admit to greedily taking the food so he walked out as casually as possible avoiding eye contact.

"You sure you aren't coming tonight?" Pepper called. Tony waved and nodded.

"How come?" Tony shrugged. Since he refused to look at her, he didn't see Pepper's smug smile.

"Well I'll tell you how it goes tonight." She said. Tony gave a thumbs up, swiping a can of coke from off the bar on his way out.

Once out hearing distance, Tony bolted to the kitchen and spat out the nastiness in a garbage can. He probably should tell Pepper someone sabotaged her food but then he'd be admitting he was guilty. And that wasn't going to happen. For all he knew, she could've done it.

He made strange gagging noises that no human should ever utter as he unscrewed the lid to the Coke bottle. Surely this would cleanse his pallet. Bringing it to his lips, Tony took a huge swig.

Then spewed it all out.

Someone had replaced the coke with a combination of Sprite and Soy Sauce.

Iron Man slowly headed back to his lab with two resolves. One was to find out for sure what or who had done this. The other was to never eat again. He broke the latter approximately five minutes later.

* * *

**A/N: This chapter turned out to be longer than I expected...**

**Review? :D **


	14. Target Practice

**A/N: Enjoy!**

* * *

Everything was falling beautifully into place much to Thor and Clint's pleasure. All they needed was to inform the other Avengers and get one last favor from Pepper.

They wheeled in the food for the meeting that wasn't ruined as Pepper threw away the sabotaged stuff.

"Well?" Pepper asked. "Did you get it?"

Clint gave her the a-okay sign. "Oh yeah, it's perfect."

"Stark was very befuddled!" Thor added.

"We have one more request," Clint told Miss Potts of their plans. "...and we were wondering if there were any old photos of Tony we can use?"

Pepper sighed as she tossed the cupcakes away. "Sorry guys, but I'm done." She grinned. "I think this and the green teeth is revenge enough for the hair."

The elevator dinging announced the arrival of the guests. "Understood," Clint said before leaving with Thor. "We'll find something else."

* * *

Tony rigged up a set of targets around his lab using spare parts from old Iron Man suits. He pulled on an Iron Man glove, the repulsors set on stun, and sat in his swivel chair, taking aim.

He blasted a deformed helmet off Bruce's desk, and another off balanced sitting on a table across the room in an attempt to clear his mind. After pondering about the food incident for a while, he suddenly realized that a lot of strange things had been happening the last several weeks.

Stranger than normal things. And that's saying something.

It may just be coincidence, right? Perhaps. But this was one coincidence too many Tony decided.

Tony blasted target after target, firing faster and more accurately the deeper in thought he got. It's too bad he was so deep in thought that when Pepper came in to inform him about the meeting that her voice startled him.

"I wanted to-"

_*ZAAAAP*_

Frozen in place, Tony's eyes widened in horror. Pepper's hand was still holding onto the door knob. Her hair stuck straight out all over her head making it look like she'd stuck her finger in an electrical socket. A few smears of suit were on her skin and clothes and if you looked long enough, it looked like there was smoke rising off her.

Swallowing, Tony said the only thing he could think of. "You should try knocking…?" It came out like more of a question than he intended it to.

Pepper didn't respond. She just shut the door in silence leaving Tony alone to practice again. He realized he forgot to ask how the guests like the food but he figured now wasn't the best time.

* * *

"You think you can get everything together in four weeks?" Steve asked Clint.

Hawkeye shrugged nonchalantly. "Aw yeah, it shouldn't be that hard."

Thor and Clint just told Steve, Natasha, and Bruce about their plans for the 'big reveal' as Clint called it, and they were all for it.

Bruce laughed. "I still can't believe Tony hasn't figured it out yet."

"Don't jinx it," Natasha teased, wrapping her knuckles on the wooden table.

"But since Pepper can't help us," Clint continued. "We'll need-"

He stopped when the door burst open. They stared at Pepper in all her repulsored glory. She was carrying a cardboard box.

"Miss Potts?" Thor inquired cautiously.

She set the box on the table in front of the archer and forced a pleasant tone. "Tony keeps all old photographs in here. Hope it helps." Then she turned on her heel and walked out.

The Avengers sat in silence for a moment.

"Well," Clint said finally. "I think Tony's doomed himself in more ways than one this time."

* * *

**A/N: Needless to say, Tony's in for it. XD **


	15. Super Selfie

**A/N: ACK! I almost forgot to post the new chapter, but here it is XP**

**This is the next to last update! Kinda bitter-sweet for me but I hope you enjoy it :)  
I didn't intend for it to have feels but... well just read on.  
**

* * *

The next few weeks for Tony were fairly uneventful and as a result, his guard was down. There were more important things to focus on.

"It's not long now," Tony sang to himself. Indeed it wasn't. Only a few more days until it was Tony Stark's birthday. He hadn't let anyone forget it either. Constantly dropping hints and whistling the 'Happy Birthday' song would've been enough, but he also left not-so-subtle post-it notes everywhere.

Although it would probably be an entirely different scenario if he knew what the Avengers actually had planned.

But the only thing on Tony's mind right now was what music to play at the party. He snagged an apple on his way back down into the lab, wiping it on his shirt before taking a bite.

He paused chewing momentarily when he realized there had been a box on the counter next to the fruit. A very familiar looking box.

Walking backwards a few steps, Tony stuck the apple in his mouth and opened it up. Ah yes, no wonder it was familiar looking. This was where he stored all the pictures from his childhood days. Pepper must have been cleaning and found it, he decided. He took the apple from his mouth and chewed thoughtfully, lifting a random photo from the box.

It was one of when Tony was about six or seven, dressed like Captain America and not looking too happy about it either. The grown Tony rolled his eyes. That had been the worst Halloween ever.

Lifting another picture from the box, Tony remembered why he hadn't gone through it in years. This box was the hiding place for all the pictures of his parents. Tony had hidden them all in here shortly after the accident.

Tony chewed slower, losing his appetite. The picture he held was one from when Tony was around five, sitting in his mother's lap, his father standing next to them. Pushing the box aside, he put down the half-eaten apple and rested his elbows on the counter as he studied the picture. It felt like this had been taken a life time ago. In a way it had been.

His gaze drifted to the straight face of his father, standing erect and proud. I small smirk tugged his lips. "I never forgave you for making me dress like Captain America," he spoke to the image. "And to think I actually know him personally now." Tony paused and made a face. "Great I've lost it. Talking to a picture."

But he kept talking anyways.

"I sometimes wish you could meet my team. My friends. Because I like to think that maybe, just maybe, you'd be proud of what I've helped accomplish." He tried to smirk, but it fell. "I'm not just some rich kid anymore and-"

A faint noise outside the door made Tony jump.

"Hello?"

No answer.

"Great, I really have lost it." He put the picture back into the box. "Later pops." Grabbing his apple, Tony resumed his walk back to his lab.

* * *

_A few moments earlier..._

Clint realized his mistake moments after hearing Tony walking down the hall. "Uh, Thor?" he asked looking up from his laptop. "Did you hide that box?"

"Nay. I though you did." Thor answered much to Clint's dismay.

Clint face-palmed. "We have to get it before Tony does."

They ran quickly and as quietly as possible, but Tony beat them to it. Clint peeked around the door and saw Tony looking through the photographs. Oops.

But he didn't expect that Tony would talk to it and by the look on Thor's face, Clint guessed he didn't expect it either. The only thing they could do was wait…

Clint began to feel guilty for eavesdropping. "_Great. Now I have feels_."

He suddenly got a new idea. He stood up and nearly collided with Thor.

"Hello?" Tony called, suspicious.

Clint put a finger to his lips and did a 'follow me' gesture to Thor who nodded. There would be a slight change of plans to Tony's birthday present.

* * *

Nearly finished with the apple, Tony jumped when Clint came barreling around the corner, followed by Thor and the other Avengers.

"Wha-" Tony began.

"Silence!" Clint interrupted. "Don't ask questions, just smile," Clint stood next to Tony and held out his phone out on front of them. The other Avengers piled together for a super selfie.

"Huh?" Tony looked confused.

"Shut up and smile Stark," Natasha said around her own smile.

He did out of confusion and Clint snapped the picture. Everyone walked away casually like nothing weird happened. Tony blinked from the flash.

"What was that all about?" he raised an eyebrow. "Do you think a selfie with me will make you internet famous or something, Clint?"

Clint didn't look up from his phone to hide his grin and shrugged. "Something like that."

Iron Man took the last bite of his apple and shook his head. Sometimes it was best to not ask questions. He tossed the apple core in the trash and started humming the birthday song.

* * *

**Shout-out to Kayleigh1789 for suggesting the feels part and also little Tony dressed as Steve.  
**

**Until next week! **


	16. The Birthday Reveal

**A/N: Well this is it! The grand finale. The thrilling climax. The farewell performance. The ****pièce de résistance. The crowning glory of- ...you get the idea.**

**But first, at the risk of sounding like a broken record, I wanted to say THANK YOU to everyone that has stuck around for this long. Whether you've been following for a while or if this is your first time reading, I can't express how grateful I am for you deeming this little drabble of mine worth your time. I've had a blast writing it and greatly appreciate every Follow, Favorite, and Review. Stay awesome y'all!  
**

**And, (I'm gonna plug my other fic one more time for good measure, haha) if by any chance you happen to want more whatever you wanna call this series, you can check out The Everyday Misadventures of Earths' Mightiest Heroes. (Also a big THANK YOU to all my readers on there as well :D) It's similar to this series but not limited to just the shenanigans of Clint and Thor. And you can also learn how this series came to be on chapter 25. **

**I know you didn't click on this story to hear me blabbering so I'll get on with it. *raises a glass of lemon-aid* Here's to you, my wonderful readers! For one last time... Enjoy :)**

* * *

The day had arrived.

"What did you get me?"

Bruce remained silent. Tony moved on to Natasha.

"What did you get me?"

"You think I'm going to tell you?" Natasha challenged.

"What did you get me?"

Thor laughed. "It is a surprise, Stark! Have patience."

"What did-"

Steve groaned. "For crying out loud, Tony, you're acting live a five-year-old."

The Avengers were busy getting the Tower ready for Tony's party but the birthday boy had other things in mind. Finding out what his present was as you've probably guessed.

Tony huffed. "Fine."

Clint resisted the urge to grin as he unrolled red and gold streamers.

* * *

When the guests began to arrive, Tony momentarily forgot about annoying his teammates. Instead he annoyed Rhodey and Pepper, trying to figure out what their gifts were.

Pepper just grinned. "Trust me Tony, you'll find out soon enough."

The other Avengers gathered off to the side, murmuring among themselves. This was it.

"May I have your attention please," Clint began.

The chatter slowly died out as everyone turned to face Barton. Tony watched with an eyebrow raised as Clint smiled.

"I just wanted to take a moment and thank you all for coming out to celebrate the birthday of Tony Stark," Clint paused to the applauds to die down. A few people standing near the billionaire slapped him on the shoulder but he just kept watching Hawkeye.

"And so for this occasion, my fellow teammates and I have put together a special something…"

Tony watched curiously as Steve set up a projector screen.

"This little montage was several months in the making. It started out with just Thor and I but it grew over time" Clint grinned wildly at Tony's confused expression. "I hope you enjoy watching it as much as I did making it."

Clint joined Natasha, Steve, Thor, and Bruce off to the side. The archer pulled a remote from his jacket pocket and hit 'play.' The screen lit up, showing the picture of young Tony dressed like Captain America. The crowd "awwwed" in unison. Then it began counting down in the old-fashioned movie way.

5

"No turning back now," Bruce murmured.

4

"Relax Banner," Clint smiled. "This is long overdue."

3

Steve snorted and Natasha whispered. "That's a slight under-statement".

2

"Shhh!" Thor hushed.

1

The screen portrayed Tony walking up to the podium for his clean energy speech. The sound of applauds flowed from the speakers as Tony took his place. Meanwhile the real Tony was trying to figure out what in the nine realms was going on.

_"Ladies and gentlemen, I want to first of all thank all of you for your support in my quest for a brighter, greener tomorrow_." Then he smiled, showing off his dark green-tinted teeth.

Tony's eyes grew wide and laughter erupted all around the room. He brought a hand to cover his mouth. His teeth had been green? Two words flashed onto the screen in bright red, capital letters:

STARK FAILS.

Oh boy.

The scene cut to Tony trying to lift Mjolnir of the Nutella jar with his Iron Man suit, a crow bar, and the Force, then flashed to him falling to the ground when Thor said 'hold this'. Thor's wink to to camera made everyone laugh but it was nothing compared to their reaction of Tony blasting a spray painted smiley face and yelling "BORED."

His reaction of when he'd thought he'd ruined Steve shield was next followed by a 'behind the scene' clip of Clint slipping in one of Coulson's replica shields. Tony's befuddled expression at Steve and Thor's tech savvy-ness played in a similar fashion. Clint giving a thumbs up to his hand held camera showed that he'd been communicating with them via earpiece.

"Well that explains a lot," Tony thought.

Next played his yell of anguish when the Hulk beat his high score of Candy Crush. Tony cringed. He still wasn't over that.

All the while, Iron Man's rendition of "Everything is Awesome" played in the background.

The laughing got quieter during Tony telling his plans about Ultron to Pepper only to be shot down. It later turned into cringes when it showed her enraged with green hair and then repulsor hair.

_"ANTHONY EDWARD STARK, I GLOW IN THE DARK?" _

Rhodey leaned over to Tony and whispered. "I'm surprised you made it to your birthday."

"Ha. Ha." Tony brushed aside, a little scared at what would show next. It was his impressions. Tony couldn't believe how naive he had been. All the party goers doubled-over from laughing so hard and Stark's face turned as red as the decorative streamers.

_"Go green, go green, go green!"_ On-screen Tony yelled, followed by more green puns. Then it came to him eating the prank food. The non-stop snickering was coupled with sounds of disgust as they read the captions that Clint added of what Tony was actually eating.

Iron Man mentally face-palmed as he turned from red to green at that gross memory. Of course it had been a collaboration…..

The scene switched one last time to Tony's speech. _"Choose the smart way, choose the earth-friendly way, choose the Stark way… Choose the green way!"_ Tony realized his speech had been a hit. Just not in the way he thought.

Then came the finale. Tony's face went slightly pale as he watched himself place the gold star stickers on the sleeping Bruce Banner. Murmurs of confusion whipped up around the billionaire and he was wondering what the odds were of the ground opening up and swallowing him whole.

"_O, say can you see, How Bruce is turning green…"_ Tony's version of the National Anthem started, but Clint did some tweaking, adding in an orchestra playing along and an American flag waving in the background. Tony had to admit that it was slightly epic.

_"Oh say does that Star-Spangled Baaannerrr yet snoooreee! On the desk next to meeeee! Cause I guess, I am a boooooree!"_ Fireworks and a jet fly-over were added to the background for the big finish. The words STARK FAILS returned to the screen and everyone erupted into thunderous applauds.

Clint glanced at Tony in the crowd. The billionaire was giving a slow clap himself. He resumed his speech after the noise settled down.

"I thought you'd like to know that this whole endeavor started out as revenge for Tony not accepting mine and Thor's friend request on every social media sight ever. So this montage has been uploaded to every social media sight ever."

More applauds. Tony just shook his head, embarrassed but slightly pleased in a weird way that Clint and Thor went through so much trouble over making an idiot out of him.

"But all joking aside," Clint took on a more serious tone. "Tony Stark you are one of a kind, as the video more than proves…."

Tony rolled his eyes and motioned for Clint to hurry up. He had some choice words for him.

"…..but you are also a genius, a hero, an Avenger, and a friend." Clint grabbed a glass off a tray and raised it. "Here's to Tony Stark," he began a toast. "Here's to Iron Man!"

"To Iron Man!" Every one repeated. The applauds returned as The Avengers melted back into the crowd towards Tony. The billionaire wasn't sure whether to thank Clint for the speech or punch him for everything else.

"Happy Birthday!" The all chorused. Clint handed Tony a wrapped gift.

"It's from all of us," he explained.

Tony gave him a look. "I thought that delightful little montage was my present."

Clint grinned. "That was only part. You aren't going to kill me in my sleep are you?"

Pretending to think for a while, Tony finally answered. "Believe you me, I'll think of something worse," he grinned evilly. "But it may take a while to top that," he motioned to the projector screen.

Thor and Clint high-fived. Stark Fails had been a success.

"Who wants cake?" Pepper announced, wheeling in a delicious looking red and gold frosted layered cake.

"I'm just surprised you didn't rig my cake to explode." Tony added, cutting a piece.

The expert archer groaned and smacked his hand against his forehead. "Why didn't I think of that?"

* * *

Tony's birthday present from the gang had been two framed pictures. The first was the picture of him with his parents and the second was of the seemingly random selfie in the hall. Tony grinned at everyone's expression. Thor was in the back flashing a peace sign. Clint gave an over sided smile while giving rabbit ears to the unsuspecting Natasha while Steve looked on disapprovingly. Bruce just barely managed to make it into the frame standing next to Tony who was smiling but looked confused.

He knew exactly where he wanted to put these.

Slipping away from the party, Tony made his way down the tower and flipped on the light switch to his lab. His eyes slowly traveled over the familiar, messy space as more laughter echoed from above. He grinned even though his face turned bright red again. Oh, it's on Clint.

He sat down in his trusty swivel chair and placed the gifts on his desk among the other clutter.

Bruce knocked on the door frame. "Knock knock," he announced his presence. "You disappeared from the party."

Tony adjusted the pictures just so and replied. "Yeah, I just came to make sure all the cameras had been taken down."

Bruce did a nervous chuckle.

"Tell me," Tony stood up and slung an arm around Bruce's neck. "What do you think of the name 'Clint Catastrophes?'"

Bruce pretended to be in deep thought as they headed for the door. "Name's pretty original. But I think the concept is a little old."

"Yeah, you're probably right..."

Tony reached for the light switch and looked once more towards his desk. Oh yes, Howard Stark would most certainly be proud.

"... but I'll think of something."

* * *

~X~ THE END ~X~


End file.
